My Very First Post!

This is my very first post - and I am nervous. I’m not sure why – I write a lot and get read quite a lot. And from what I hear, blogs are a very spontaneous, rough hewn medium: Climb up on your soapbox, open your mouth and sound off.

So why should I be nervous? I’m sure that it’s partly because in this medium I am determined to be personal. Not just My Convictions, but here’s the guy with the convictions - not exactly naked, but perhaps not entirely clothed either.

The professional stuff that I write is My Conviction stuff. It is all earnestly believed and felt, and it all comes from my experience. But you wouldn’t know that from the writing, because I almost never use the pronoun “I.” (See for yourself – visit marriagesupport.com, and read a few of the articles.)

I want to do the blog differently. I want to mix the professional voice and the personal voice. I want to wear the relationship coach/counselor hat and take it off now and then – under which, you know, I am fairly bald.

Not scary to be professional. Not scary to be personal. Somewhat scary to be both – in the same communication.

Or is it excitement? Fear and excitement are right next door from each other – like the top of the rollercoaster ride. Something tells me - this is going to be an exciting ride.

Comments

[Steve]

Good luck Doc! I think your Blog is great, and a neat forum for expressing thoughts "between" the personal and professional... Won't use this for a "need help" post, but simply wishing you great success. We are exploring the world of your website... :)

[Christina]

Dear Dr. Sanford, I'm so excited to find your website. And to see that your first BLOG posting was just two days ago - on exactly the day that I was clearing out years of old stuff from my home office and book shelves and came across a newspaper clipping of a column you wrote -- for the Maine Sunday Telegram, Sunday September 2, 2001! It's titled "Tell each other how you Want to be Wanted" - I loved it then when a dear friend who lived in Sanford, ME sent it to me ... and I love it now as I re-read it ... and debate whether to ask my husband to read it! Your website was mentioned at the bottom of the column and that's how I come to be reading your blog today. Amazing! I do believe in synchronicity, grace, call it what you will ... but I've been praying for guidance everyday for my marriage ... and perhaps ... just perhaps you are a part of the answer? I so totally resonate with the practical notion of 'everyday love' ... every day kindness, living love every moment. So why is it so difficult to do sometimes with the person closest to me?

[DebraW]

Instead of settling into another session of self pity and embittered hatred of my husband this morning, I found your site. It is not preachy and makes good sense and gives me a glimmer of hope, so thanks.

[Geneva]

To Rosie: From your post, and at the risk of assuming, it sounds like you are not the "party" type. However, I like your frame of reference for empowering your "...husband to appreciate more of what you have together. Is your husband aware of your charitable aspiration to find mutually agreeble ways for the two of you to be together? And why are you sitting alone, and then enduring the "fog brain" syndrome the day after? Is it possible that you are stuck in a cycle of punishing yourself for your husband's behavior? Ideally the two of you will find some way to enjoy one another that your husband will learn to value more than his partying. In the meantime, may I suggest that you seek alternatives through volunteer work or some other endeavor that is acceptable to both you and your husband? What are your thought in this regard?