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« Who Has Permission to Do What and Why? | Main | I Just Want Her to Be Happy »

February 27, 2007

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Sarah

Hi Dr. Sanford.

As a reader of your couple support site I want to thank you. I am certain that your compassion for this work provides much needed mentorship to many couples - and yet so many decisoins are tough to make.

While Im not sure that I see clearly to write at this time. Wannt to let you know this; Fear is never simple and yet can be simply stated. From here I digress...

..and question, what are the positive and also the negative aspects of fear? With intendt I look fear in da face and tell my loved ones we are o.k.

Ambiguious as this might seem conflict is a matrix, where regarding we must be a we dimension of we, I think.

Thank you,

An avid reader

David Sanford

Hi Sarah,

Thanks for your comments. We should respect fear, I think. If we run from our fear or deny it, we are apt to miss the important information that our fear almost certainly holds for us.

Sometimes it helps to rename our fear as “caution” or “warning” and then stop judging ourselves for being afraid. Instead, ask our fear what is the caution or warning it contains for us. Expect an answer. When the answer comes, consider: Can we use the caution or warning that it contains? Often we can.

David Sanford

Hi Sarah,

Thanks for your comments. We should respect fear, I think. If we run from our fear or deny it, we are apt to miss the important information that our fear almost certainly holds for us.

Sometimes it helps to rename our fear as “caution” or “warning” and then stop judging ourselves for being afraid. Instead, ask our fear what is the caution or wearing it contains for us. Expect an answer. When the answer comes, consider: Can we use the caution or warning that it contains? Often we can.

David Sanford

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really interesting points. I'm a business writer and the rationale is the same in writing for keeping it clear, simple & concise. If you confuse your reader or presentation audience with too many words, concepts or angles, you create the same effect as the amateur photographer using an over-stuffed composition - confusion and ultimate loss of interest. so now link my name to see my website.

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Really good points.Many people don't want to make these important decisions , because they just follow the easy "way" in their lifes.Thanks for the article.

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